Wisdomist Wednesday : Working out

I’ll be honest, I’m not sharing any sort of wisdomist knowledge today … just blabbing a bit.

How many times have I nagged your beautiful faces off about my love hate relationship with working out?!?

Oh, only a zillion times …well … I’m about to do it a zillion and one times.

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I hadn’t worked out for at least 6 weeks … maybe a little bit longer.

First, it was Ramadan and while fasting – I couldn’t keep my eyes open or my energy level high enough to make it through a day of work, there was no way I was about to put the added pressure of working out on my body. Granted, I’m a slightly psycho – but I also don’t desire sending myself to the hospital.

After Ramadan, I decided to jump back in and resorted to my usual work out – Jillian Michaels 30 day shred, level 1 … I’ve been doing level one forever. It kills me, I get the workout I want – it hurts, but doesn’t leave me splattered on the floor like roadrunner. What I completely forgot though, is since I hadn’t been working out for a while – and since my body wasn’t back to it’s normal strength this probably wasn’t the best idea!! Doctors orders – I couldn’t work out for a week.

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Last week, I tried the treadmill … something a little lighter … 40 minutes, 3 times for the week. I DIED. I wasn’t even running … I was frustrated. I am frustrated.

This week, I said ahhh what the heck – I jumped back on the Jillian Michaels train – I’ve done it 2 days now – tonight, I’ll do it again. But HOLY MOTHER of all that is sparkly and sweet … I’m getting destroyed by it. It’s frustrating to think that mentally I’m so ready to work out, I want to … I hate missing my workouts, it’s part of my routine .. I don’t actually love working out, but I love the feeling after. Physically, I don’t know what the heck is going on with my body.

Today, I sit here, SO incredibly sore. My legs are wobbly, my arms can’t go over my shoulders. I’m not complaining, I understand that part of working out, is being sore at times – but it’s definitely discouraging. I understand if I was unwell, or even getting older, but it’s strange to feel that my body isn’t keeping up with my mind.

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Just venting I suppose … and yes, this can totally count as a first world problem. I plan to just stick with in, eventually my body will get re-use to working out and it will all be well and good again – until then, I plan to hobble and smell like an old lady with sports cream ( dear husband, it doesn’t get any sexier than this … sorry 😉 ).

I hope you lovely folks are having a great week, I’ll be back sooon with a trashy banana bread ( … and that right there, is why I work out!!)

Wisdomist Wednesday: The Strength of a Woman

00ab6af3d9d0de0c993fa277e54ebae2My best friends

My Aunts

My Cousins

My Mother

My Grandmother

Thank you for being the strongest of women in my eyes.

Thank you for taking on this royally messed up world, and laughing with it, playing with fire and owning who you are. You inspire me. You give me hope.

I remember in my early teens someone told me I’d be doing the most growing up over the next couple of years. To be honest, I can’t remember who said it … but they lied.

I would actually argue that my most growing up has been happening through the latter half of my 20’s. This sort of growing up, has little to do with my physical appearance ( Note: yesterday I noticed I had more grey hair than ever before … WTF?!? … I’m tempted to pull a Nicole Richie and go soft purple #DramaQueen) but emotionally, and mentally ; I feel like what I want out of life, what I stand for, my personal value, and  the role I play in this seriously psychotic world are being redefined and rediscovered.

It’s both a scary and exciting feeling. I’ve come to accept that sometimes life can be a bed of roses, take the time to appreciate and smell each one of them; in that moment be thankful. And when life is straight up crap, we’re all stronger than we give ourselves credit for. Once upon a time I used to think this strength was in a way, a sign of weakness, of not wanting to deal with reality, in a way “ignorance is bliss”… it’s not weakness. It’s care. Love. It’s the little girl in me who still believes that everything around us can still be happily ever after … it’s not naivety, but hope.

I’m sure if I look back 10 years from now, I’ll think … darling, you have no idea … your 30’s are really where you grow!! For all the women out there, muscle up; give yourself the credit you so well deserve, you may not know it, but you’re holding it all together.